Sunday, August 21, 2011

Down and Up

Yesterday I read something by an Indian author, after a long time. Having been really let down by some of my recent readings, what with the bad writing, worse spellings and grammar still rankling in my mind, it took a lot of effort to actually get myself started on this one.

"Keep the change" by Nirupama Subramanian proved to be a surprisingly readable book, and though I knew less than halfway through what the end was going to be, I was happy to be reading some good English. And, ignoring the little voice in my head telling me not to move on to the next book so soon, I was lulled into thinking that writing standards have improved.

The next book I happened to have was called "Have you met the Joker?", supposedly the writer's third book. It made me wonder who on Earth was crazy enough to read the first two and encourage him to write a third.

The author's introduction mentioned that he was an engineer. That in itself should have warned me. But, like a fool, I insisted on pursuing it till the end. How I wish I hadn't!

Well, my BEEPS (Bad English & Errors in Punctuation Sensors) went on Red Alert by the time I had come to the second page. I tried ignoring that and read on in the hope of finding the story. And now, the book is over, thought he'd some story to say (in Pink Floyd style). There was no plot, instead there was some note by the author, it seemed like some "philosophy" to me. And since these days, every third person is a philosopher, why not he? (or is it him? - asking this makes me feel like Emsworth!)

Hey, Mr.Author - please enlighten this poor ignorant soul - what is a "dotted child"? I though you were talking about a human child. If it were a leopard cub or a cheetah cub you were talking about, it would have been a different matter altogether. But, as I said, you were talking about a child. A human one at that. So, why was it dotted?

Ok, I'll stop questioning you about the dotted child. But tell me, do you read as a "usual habit"? And do thrillers take off at once? And please do tell me this : how can a book shiver you? I've read Angels and Demons too, but it didn't "shiver" me. Even the cold winter breeze doesn't do that to me. It makes me shiver, and I shiver. But never in all the years of my existence has a book shivered me.

And yes, what is the meaning of "What on earth do you think who I am?" ????????? I've given up trying to figure out that one.

I'll stop now, as I don't want to act as proofreader for your already published junk. Don't even get me started on your pathetic efforts at writing what I think were supposed to be scenes of passion and lovemaking!!!

And thanks for putting me off Indian authors again for a long time to come.

All this makes me wonder why is it that most of the time, only the worst junk gets published?

And to think, there is so much good writing available online :

This has some really good stuff. And the writer's a techie. Almost makes me revise my opinion of techies who can write. And incidentally, I'm getting addicted to his puns.

Chuck, as he calls himself is recommended reading for anyone who has or wants to have a sense of humour.

(And when the above two join hands, or minds, or whatever it that they join... wait, that sounds weird, what I meant was that apart from their individual blogs, this one to which they both contribute is also like a Godsend...)

Given their huge following, I don't think Sayesha, Silverine or Sunshine needs any introduction. Nor does Chutney Case.

And of course, Son of Bosey and this.
There are many more out there in the blogging world, so I still have faith in Indian writing.

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